Atheist quotes #2

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These quotes are slightly more anonymous than the ones in the first post,  and I cannot find the sources for them.

“Instead of being born again, why not just GROW UP?” 

“Darwin loves you!”

“God was my copilot but we crashed in the mountains and I had to eat him.”

“God, protect me from your followers!”

“Who would Jesus bomb?”

“Fine, I evolved, you didn’t.”

“Militant agnostic: I don’t know, and you don’t either.”

“Want to see God? Keep texting while you drive.”

“Last time we mixed politics and religion, people got burned at stake.”

“It’s your Hell, you burn in it.”

“Don’t pray in my school, and I won’t think in your church.”

“Two hands working can do more than a thousand clasped in prayer.”

“And if there were a God, I think it very unlikely that He would have such an uneasy vanity as to be offended by those who doubt His existence.”

“There once was a time when all people believed in God and the church ruled. This time was called the Dark Ages.”

“Give a man a fish and he will eat for a day; teach a man to fish and he will eat for a lifetime; give a man religion and he will die praying for a fish.”

“If god doesn’t like the way I live, Let him tell me, not you.”

“Facts do not cease to exist because they are ignored.”

“The invisible and the non-existent look very much alike.”

“You keep believing, I’ll keep evolving.”

“Faith does not give you the answers; it just stops you asking the questions.”

“‘My God, my God, why have you forsaken me?’ Do not sound like the words of someone who had planned it to happen that way and knew of it in advance.”

“Science flies people to the moon, religion flies people into buildings.”

“Don’t worry, primates often have trouble imagining a universe not run by an angry alpha male.”

“The Bible has fingerprints all over it. And none of them are God-sized.”

“A mind is like a parachute. It doesn’t work if it’s not open.”

“God is Perfect: Perfect beings do not experience anger or surprise towards a sequence of events they knew of in advance.”

“If you have to lie to prove what you believe, then what you believe is a lie.”

“If all the Christians who have called other Christians “not really a Christian” were to vanish, there’d be no Christians left.”

“You’ve got to question a story where the fruit of knowledge is forbidden.”

“A believer states everything must have a creator but fail to say how he was created.”

“For long you live and high you fly; And smiles you give and tears you’ll cry; And all you touch and all you see; Is all your life will ever be.”

“Absolute faith corrupts as absolutely as absolute power.”

“Um, Genesis says God look a nap (just like an over-worked factory worker) on the 7th day after he’d done all that planet-building. Was the writer of that book not familiar with the exact meaning of the term ‘omnipotent’?”

“Christianity Versus Islam… two bald men fighting over a comb.”

– Unknown

Link to atheist quotes #1 can be found here.

Image courtesy of Arvind Balaraman at FreeDigitalPhotos.net

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